Pillow Talk

Last week as the kiddos were getting ready for bed, my sweet pea excitedly tells me how she applied for a "job" at school. She informs that if she is chosen she will need to go to the school at 7:30 in the morning as she would be a "bank teller" and they need time setting things up. I told her great and I said, did you have to do anything when you applied and she goes on about how she had to fill out an application and that one of the questions was, "Why do you think we should pick you for this position?"
I was curious, so I said, what did you write? And she said, "well you know things like I am responsible, kind, but then I put because I am AWESOME, in capital letters and with three exclamation points. I burst out laughing and said, well then there is no question, they should totally pick you. She smiled and I said so will you be disappointed if you don't get the job and she said, "I think it would be fun, but if it is not me that's okay too."
I told her to keep me posted and then planted her dreams for the night and went to do the same with my little man. After they were in bed, I couldn't stop thinking about what she put on her paper, "because I am AWESOME!!!" and I know it is such a minor thing, but when I was her age, I definitely didn't have the self-confidence to a) apply for a school job and b) would never consider writing down that I was awesome, because I didn't believe that at her age.
And as a parent you want your children to believe in themselves and their capabilities, to have a good self-image, and to be kind to others, but you never know how they internalize these things. And I never have thought to ask my kids what they thought of themselves, it was something I never thought to ask. We typically ask questions like:

• What are you thankful for today
• What did you dream about
• What was your favorite thing about today
• What did you learn about
• What is the best thing about school, friend, or your teacher

And it made me think that we should incorporate some other questions throughout the week, such as:

• Who is your hero
• What are you most proud about
• How would you describe yourself
• What is the best compliment you have received and given

I was completely amazed by what my sweet pea had shared in that discussion because I knew that she didn't lack confidence in herself, that she saw herself as an awesome little girl and in that moment my heart melted. Of course you don't want your child to have so much self-confidence that they are narcissistic or arrogant, but you definitely want them to have self-worth and a positive self-image. 
And as I reflected on my own memories, I couldn't hold back my tears - it really hasn't been till recently that I am comfortable with my own self and that I started to feel confident in myself and it is not that my parents weren't encouraging because they were.There are just certain things that can happen in life that sometimes break your spirit and suddenly you see the world through a different lens then you once did...moments that happen that you wish didn't, but in the end you learn from them, even if it takes you a while.
Anyway, it made me feel blessed that my children have a good self-image of themselves, that they really do believe in themselves, that they feel they are awesome individuals because I certainly believe it! And it is these type of nights that I enjoy our pillow chats with my kiddos, I never know what I will learn.

"The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it.”- J.M. Barrie