I think I posted earlier that we took our house off the market since we are going into colder months and I don't want to deal with any thought of a move during that time. And it is the best decision because we can't decide what that next step is going to be - both of us have different ideas of what that looks like.
I look at these brand new homes and think yes, those are nice and look at all the space and again think, yes it is nice, but it is not me. There is no character and honestly I don't want to spend the rest of my life paying a mortgage for a house, I don't want to work to live, I want to work to play.
I realize that our culture tells us from earlier on that there are steps to becoming an adult and as you grow and earn a bit more, your spending habits increase and you should upgrade your home, your belongings, etc...and at one time in my life I definitely wanted that dream. I wanted a big house to have dinner parties and entertain.
Yet, the older I become the more I realize how all those things for me are simply illusions. And I don't want that, I don't need a huge expensive home. What I do want is to live a more simple life and I know that means different things to different people.
For me, it means letting go of all the non-essential stuff and doing more of the things I love and living in a home that provides us exactly what we need, no more, no less....(do we need a bigger home when we don't even use the extra space in our current home? Do I really need the 10 pairs of boots in my closet) - No, so for me it means evaluating what is most important to me and getting rid of everything else. Getting rid of the clutter so I'm left with only the things have give meaning. Yet, I get overwhelmed because I walk into a room and have no idea where to begin.
The goal for me is to start this process by looking at all my commitments (work, family, hobbies, volunteer projects, home, etc) and identifying what needs to stay and consider what is in line with my priorities and values and start to eliminate those that don't. Obviously, I need to work, and I do love what I do, so for me, my current job situation aligns nicely with my life priorities, but some of my commitments I took on thinking it was important, but have realized it is energy draining and I'm ready to let it go. I'll finish with my commitments, but will not renew any future commitment.
The other goal I have is for us as a family to start working on one room at a time and identifying the items that give us meaning and those that don't and being decluttering.
I don't know where this journey will take me, but I see friends lose family members, I see my children get older, I know I'm getting older and I realize the things I cherish the most are all the experiences I have with my friends, my family - the laughter between friends, the joy of watching a rugby game with your family, the peacefulness you feel when you are surrounded by nature, the intimate kiss with the person you love - that is what I want.
I've realized that if I were to leave this world tomorrow, the impact I have on my spouse or children is not what I have provided them in things, but the emotional support I have given them, the memories I have created. Realizing that tomorrow is not promised, I want more experiences, I want more memories to create. And I'd rather work really hard to live a simply life that lets me travel and see and do the things I want than work really hard to pay for a mortgage for the rest of my life, but I also realize I have a spouse and children to consider. So, is there idea the same as mine? No, not really - my sweet pea keeps insisting that our next house be a two-story home, my wee man - he says he doesn't care so long as he can take his legos. My hub - he wants land and a nice home, but is open...he doesn't want a tiny house because he knew I was going to suggest that after watching "Tiny" (knows me to well that man of mine)...so for now, I'll be patient and flexible and start with my winter plan of decluttering because at the end of the day, I am happy and content and I know I have everything I need.
“...there are often many things we feel we should do that, in fact, we
don't really have to do. Getting to the point where we can tell the
difference is a major milestone in the simplification process.”- Elaine St. James
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