Well 2013 has left and a new year is upon us. Of course as I reflect on 2013, to sum it up in one word would be transformation, not just for me, but as a family too. We did a 100-day challenge to eat only whole foods (we wanted to limit the amount of processed foods we were eating). We not only accomplished the 100-day challenge, but we simply continued on...the kids didn't seem to notice and we just stuck with preparing real foods, eating more fresh fruit and veggies. We weren't doing this to lose weight, but as you read about the chemicals that are put into our foods and the problems associated, we wanted to become more aware of what we were putting into our bodies. My little man has eczema and since switching our diet, not only has the eczema calmed down, but his flare ups only occur once in a while, which is definitely an improvement from where it was. My skin has cleared up and I've dropped six pant sizes (I don't know how much weight as we don't have a scale). The hubbers has also dropped four pants sizes. The other transformation, which I have blogged about, was the act of letting go and enjoying the moment.
Sometimes we try so hard to make different relationships work because you think you should and it ends up causing more headaches and heartaches trying to force yourself to fit into a world you don't really belong. So, while on vacation in the beautiful Cayman Brac an "ah-ha" moment hit me and I gave myself permission to let go. Too often, we feel we must carry this weight of past hurt, past anger, resentment and we carry it, letting it shape us and our attitude and I let it go. Let go of the grudges, regrets, and left the hurts and disappointments behind. I came back refreshed and full of positive feelings and things have been for the better ever since. I'm almost a bit sad that 2013 is over because it was one of my best years, but I look to 2014 with excitement because I know that I am the one in control of my future and ultimately my happiness. And at the end of the day, I will always choose happiness and I hope happiness fills 2014 for you as well! Happy New Year!
I saw the below quote and had to share! Enjoy.....
"When
you feel connected to and in harmony with the universal mind of
intention, you’ll sense a major difference in how other people react to
you. These reactions are important because they bear directly on your
ability to fulfill your own individual intentions, your goals and
dreams. The more closely you resonate with the frequencies of
the universal all-creating Source, the more others will be impacted.
They’ll gravitate toward you, bringing peace, joy, love, beauty, and
abundance into your life. Here, in my opinion, are some of the ways in
which you’ll impact others when you’re resonating with intention:
Your presence instills calmness.
When you coincide with intention, your impact on others has a calming
influence. People tend to feel more at peace, less threatened, and more
at ease. The power of intention is the power of love and receptivity. It
asks nothing of anyone, it judges no one, and it encourages others to
be free to be themselves. As people feel calmer in your presence,
they’re inclined to feel safe, by virtue of the energy frequencies that
you radiate. Their feelings are encouraged by your energy of love and
receptivity, causing them to want to reach out and be with you.
Your presence leaves others feeling energized.
When you bring the frequencies of intention into the presence of
others, they’ll feel energized just by being in your immediate circle.
You don’t have to say a word. You don’t have to act in any prescribed
fashion. Your energy of intention alone will make others in your field
feel as if they’ve mysteriously been empowered. They’ll want to assist
you in fulfilling your own dreams.
Your presence allows others to feel better about themselves.
Have you ever noticed when you’re in the presence of certain people
that you feel better about yourself? Their compassionate energy has the
noticeably pleasant impact of simply making you feel really good about
yourself. You’ll impact others with this energy of compassion as you
develop your connection to intention. People will sense that you care
about them, understand them, and are interested in them as unique
individuals.
Your presence allows others to feel unified.
The effect of being in the presence of people expressing high
frequencies is to feel unified and connected to all of nature, all of
humankind, and to intention. As you raise your frequencies, your impact
on others invites them to be on the same team. You are unified and want
to assist each other in the fulfillment of a common objective.
Your presence instills a sense of purpose.
When you’re in the higher spiritual energies, your presence and
behavior from a space of love, acceptance, nonjudgment, and kindness
becomes a catalyst for others to feel on purpose in their lives. By
staying at the higher energies of optimism, forgiveness, understanding,
reverence for Spirit, creativity, serenity, and bliss, you radiate this
energy. The people around you begin to feel your quiet reverence and
serenity. Your own purpose, which revolves around serving others and
therefore serving God, becomes fulfilled, and as a bonus, you create
allies.
Your presence allows others to trust in authentic personal connections.
By bringing the traits of intention to others, you allow trust to be
present. You’ll notice both an inclination and a willingness on the part
of others to open up and confide in you. This is related to the quality
of trust. In the atmosphere of higher energy, people trust and want to
share their personal stories with you.
Your presence inspires others to greatness.
When you’re connected to Spirit and quietly reflect this consciousness,
you become a source of inspiration to others. In a sense, this is one
of the most powerful effects that connecting to intention transmits to
others. The word inspiration means “in-spirit.” The fact that you’re
primarily in-spirit means that you inspire rather than inform with your
presence.
Your presence aligns others with beauty.
When you’re connected to intention, you see beauty everywhere and in
everything because you’re radiating the quality of beauty. Your
perceptual world changes dramatically. At the higher energy of intent,
you see beauty in everyone, young or old, rich or poor, dark or light,
with no distinctions. Everything is perceived from a perspective of
appreciation rather than judgment. As you bring this feeling of
beauty appreciation to the presence of others, people are inclined to
see themselves as you see them. They feel attractive and better about
themselves. When people feel beautiful, they act in beautiful ways.
Your presence instills health rather than sickness.
Your connection to your Source keeps you focused on what you intend to
manifest into your life, with no energy given to what you don’t want.
This internal focus doesn’t permit you to complain about what ails you
or to think about disease, pain, or any physical difficulties. Your
energy is always on creating love, and expanding the perfection from
which you originated." Wayne Dyer
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
Tuesday, December 24, 2013
Christmas Reflections
Yes, it is that time of year...lights glistening, the smells of baking, and the wrapping of things. And of course as the year closes, I've been reflecting on Christmas pasts and the year in general.
I've been thinking of my grandparents lately and cherishing those memories that I hold close to my heart.
This year has definitely been a year of transformation for us - I've let go of a lot of negative feelings and as a family we decided to become more healthy and aware of what we are eating. In fact, this Christmas dinner we will be having a whole foods (non-processed) dinner - we are making everything with fresh produce and whole grain flour - the hubbers was in charge of the pastry for our pies and we pretty much spent the entire morning today in the kitchen prepping for dinner tomorrow.
On the menu is Pumpkin French Toast bake, Christmas Quiche, Squash/Barley Pie, Cornbread stuffing, potatoes, and carrots. I will say it is a lot of extra work, but it is worth it - we feel great about what we are eating and it was fun working in the kitchen together.
I really feel 2013 has been a year full of blessings for us - I feel great, the kids make me laugh, my parents are doing good and life in general is feckin' awesome. Which is hard, because so many close to us experience a year of loss in some way or another and my heart would ache and I hope those who have experience loss this year, I hope that next year will be filled with many blessings.
However you spend your Christmas, I hope you are blessed in every way that brings you joy and peace!
“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”- Dr. Seuss
I've been thinking of my grandparents lately and cherishing those memories that I hold close to my heart.
This year has definitely been a year of transformation for us - I've let go of a lot of negative feelings and as a family we decided to become more healthy and aware of what we are eating. In fact, this Christmas dinner we will be having a whole foods (non-processed) dinner - we are making everything with fresh produce and whole grain flour - the hubbers was in charge of the pastry for our pies and we pretty much spent the entire morning today in the kitchen prepping for dinner tomorrow.
On the menu is Pumpkin French Toast bake, Christmas Quiche, Squash/Barley Pie, Cornbread stuffing, potatoes, and carrots. I will say it is a lot of extra work, but it is worth it - we feel great about what we are eating and it was fun working in the kitchen together.
I really feel 2013 has been a year full of blessings for us - I feel great, the kids make me laugh, my parents are doing good and life in general is feckin' awesome. Which is hard, because so many close to us experience a year of loss in some way or another and my heart would ache and I hope those who have experience loss this year, I hope that next year will be filled with many blessings.
However you spend your Christmas, I hope you are blessed in every way that brings you joy and peace!
“And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store. What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”- Dr. Seuss
Wednesday, November 13, 2013
October was a blur.......
The other day someone remarked that there were only 45 days till Christmas and I thought, that can't be, it's still October....and then I realized, wait, it's November. Where in the hell did October disappear too and why on earth are they playing Christmas music already before Thanksgiving!
October was pretty much a blur for me, we were all sick, my sweet pea was battling bronchitis, my little man and the hubby kept getting colds and I was knocked over with pneumonia. And I mean literally I was out of it, I have never had pneumonia before and it was horrible, in bed for pretty much two and half weeks, zero energy....the flu isn't even as bad as this was. I still have a bad cough, but I hear that will linger for a while.
Typically we don't get very sick, so it seemed odd that during October we just couldn't stay healthy. I've restocked my vitamin C, manuka honey, and hopefully the rest of the fall/winter will be kind to us, especially since I don't really remember October.
So, now we are full swing into November and Christmas will be here before I realize or necessarily want it to. We are going to attempt something different this year, we have asked the grandparents to give "experiences" instead of giving toys to our children. We talked about it with the kids and asked if they could remember what toy was given to them last year, it took them almost a day to recall it, but when we asked what some of their favorite memories were, the response was instant and it was "experiences" they recalled, going to the movies, going places or doing things with them.
Of course, Father Christmas will bring some toys around, I'm sure, but I think this will make the holiday season a little more special and not to mention that my kids don't need any more toys or things, it is definitely not that it is not appreciated, but it seems like we are overwhelmed with "things" and the shopping culture. I read an article recently that was mentioning how some stores will be opening at 5:00 pm on Thanksgiving day for their "Black Friday" specials - how can you even call it "Black Friday" when it is happening on Thanksgiving Thursday? These stores are taking their employees from their families and what is even sadder is that consumers will go out in the droves. I don't get it.....we are conditioning our young ones to be nothing more than consumers, to spend, spend and want the latest "whatchamathing" because that will make us a better person, will give us a better life. Right? The ad definitely makes me think so.....
I hate it, because everywhere you turn, we are bombarded with reminders that it is not relationships with people that matter, but the items you accumulate. If I buy my children the "right" shoes, then that will make me a better mom and so forth. Really? And yes, there was a shoe store commercial that depicted that situation that played over and over during "back to school" month.
Do we need to be made to feel this way? Do we even care that we are being made to feel this way?
And believe me, I didn't always feel this way life - I use to think that money would definitely make me a happier person or if I had a bigger house, etc...I would somehow feel better about myself, that somehow if I just got to that next point, life would be easier.
Yet as the older I become, the more I realize what a falsehood that is, the mass accumulation of stuff will not bring me any more happiness than whatever current state of mind I am in, it is the connections with my family, and friends that bring me happiness.
And don't get me wrong, just because I feel this was doesn't mean that I expect everyone else too or that I think anyone who purchases expensive things is horrible. I think it is the attitude behind that purchasing power, what is the driving force behind it - do you like it because you love those things or do you like it because an ad convinced you that it will make you somehow a better person?
I know several people who have expensive taste, but are also some of the most selfless people I know and they work hard for every dollar they make. And I know some who follow trends simply because it is the "in" thing and are selfish individuals. What bothers me, are the perceptions that ads and society create, that somehow if you lack these things you are not "complete" as a person.
So, I know that definitely became a rant and if you made it to the end, all I want is to make sure my children have reminders of what really matters, the relationships with the people in their lives and so I hope this Christmas, it will be filled with many experiences that my children will cherish.
"Our lives are mere flashes of light in an infinitely empty universe. In 12 years of education the most important lesson I have learned is that what we see as “normal” living is truly a travesty of our potential. In a society so governed by superficiality, appearances, and petty economics, dreams are more real than anything anything in the “real world”. Refuse normalcy. Beauty is everywhere, love is endless, and joy bleeds from our everyday existence. Embrace it. I love all of you, all my friends, family, and community. I am ceaselessly grateful from the bottom of my heart for everyone. The only thing I can ask of you is to stay free of materialism. Remember that every day contains a universe of potential; exhaust it. Live and love so immensely that when death comes there is nothing left for him to take. Wealth is love, music, sports, learning, family and freedom. Above all, stay gold.”- Dominic Owen Mallary
October was pretty much a blur for me, we were all sick, my sweet pea was battling bronchitis, my little man and the hubby kept getting colds and I was knocked over with pneumonia. And I mean literally I was out of it, I have never had pneumonia before and it was horrible, in bed for pretty much two and half weeks, zero energy....the flu isn't even as bad as this was. I still have a bad cough, but I hear that will linger for a while.
Typically we don't get very sick, so it seemed odd that during October we just couldn't stay healthy. I've restocked my vitamin C, manuka honey, and hopefully the rest of the fall/winter will be kind to us, especially since I don't really remember October.
So, now we are full swing into November and Christmas will be here before I realize or necessarily want it to. We are going to attempt something different this year, we have asked the grandparents to give "experiences" instead of giving toys to our children. We talked about it with the kids and asked if they could remember what toy was given to them last year, it took them almost a day to recall it, but when we asked what some of their favorite memories were, the response was instant and it was "experiences" they recalled, going to the movies, going places or doing things with them.
Of course, Father Christmas will bring some toys around, I'm sure, but I think this will make the holiday season a little more special and not to mention that my kids don't need any more toys or things, it is definitely not that it is not appreciated, but it seems like we are overwhelmed with "things" and the shopping culture. I read an article recently that was mentioning how some stores will be opening at 5:00 pm on Thanksgiving day for their "Black Friday" specials - how can you even call it "Black Friday" when it is happening on Thanksgiving Thursday? These stores are taking their employees from their families and what is even sadder is that consumers will go out in the droves. I don't get it.....we are conditioning our young ones to be nothing more than consumers, to spend, spend and want the latest "whatchamathing" because that will make us a better person, will give us a better life. Right? The ad definitely makes me think so.....
I hate it, because everywhere you turn, we are bombarded with reminders that it is not relationships with people that matter, but the items you accumulate. If I buy my children the "right" shoes, then that will make me a better mom and so forth. Really? And yes, there was a shoe store commercial that depicted that situation that played over and over during "back to school" month.
Do we need to be made to feel this way? Do we even care that we are being made to feel this way?
And believe me, I didn't always feel this way life - I use to think that money would definitely make me a happier person or if I had a bigger house, etc...I would somehow feel better about myself, that somehow if I just got to that next point, life would be easier.
Yet as the older I become, the more I realize what a falsehood that is, the mass accumulation of stuff will not bring me any more happiness than whatever current state of mind I am in, it is the connections with my family, and friends that bring me happiness.
And don't get me wrong, just because I feel this was doesn't mean that I expect everyone else too or that I think anyone who purchases expensive things is horrible. I think it is the attitude behind that purchasing power, what is the driving force behind it - do you like it because you love those things or do you like it because an ad convinced you that it will make you somehow a better person?
I know several people who have expensive taste, but are also some of the most selfless people I know and they work hard for every dollar they make. And I know some who follow trends simply because it is the "in" thing and are selfish individuals. What bothers me, are the perceptions that ads and society create, that somehow if you lack these things you are not "complete" as a person.
So, I know that definitely became a rant and if you made it to the end, all I want is to make sure my children have reminders of what really matters, the relationships with the people in their lives and so I hope this Christmas, it will be filled with many experiences that my children will cherish.
"Our lives are mere flashes of light in an infinitely empty universe. In 12 years of education the most important lesson I have learned is that what we see as “normal” living is truly a travesty of our potential. In a society so governed by superficiality, appearances, and petty economics, dreams are more real than anything anything in the “real world”. Refuse normalcy. Beauty is everywhere, love is endless, and joy bleeds from our everyday existence. Embrace it. I love all of you, all my friends, family, and community. I am ceaselessly grateful from the bottom of my heart for everyone. The only thing I can ask of you is to stay free of materialism. Remember that every day contains a universe of potential; exhaust it. Live and love so immensely that when death comes there is nothing left for him to take. Wealth is love, music, sports, learning, family and freedom. Above all, stay gold.”- Dominic Owen Mallary
Monday, September 23, 2013
Piano Tuner
So my wee man has been taking piano lessons for a bit and our piano is way out of tune and I mean out of tune. I finally got around to calling and having someone come and tune it for us.
He was suppose to come this morning, but about 20 minutes before he calls and says he had an unexpected appointment and depending on the outcome could he come after or if need be reschedule. He said it was health related and I said, "Of course, you have to take care of your health." He thanked me and said "I will either come by after my appointment or give you a call back."
A couple hours go by and he phones to tell me he will be by in a few minutes. He pulls up and out comes this older, full white beard, shorter type gentleman carrying a small tackle-like box. He comes in, looks at the piano, asks how we got it and checks it out. He tells me this is going to be a shock to the system, meaning that this piano is way out of tune and I'm like, "yea buddy, I know."
He then asked who played and I said my son, he is a beginner player. We small talked about music and I tell him how I am envious of anyone who has any sort of musical talent. I tell him about my grandparents and how my granddad and his brothers were all self-taught, but highly talented musicians and my nanny played the violin. I said somehow all that talent skipped me, he laughed. He said it is nice that I'm giving my kids the opportunity to play and I joked saying they had no choice.
I left him to get started on tuning the piano and then a few minutes later as I walked by, he stops and starts talking to me. At first thought, I didn't pay much attention, but then I could sense something was bothering him, he goes on about his health and how healthy he has been and it was at his wife's urging that he go to the doctor. He said I'm not sure what is going to come after all this, but I don't want to get caught in the system, you know, I'm an older man and I've seen so many get caught, I still have control over myself, so I imagine there is going to be a some sort of conflict after all is said and done.
I felt a bit uncomfortable, as I wasn't quite sure what to say, but then I thought, maybe he needs to just talk, so I didn't ask any questions, I just let him talk and I listened. He told me how he has led a full life of 73 years and if he goes, he wants to be in control, but then he would pause and say, it's my wife. I don't believe in miracles and she is not a patient women, I love her and I know she loves me, but I wouldn't want to do that to her, I don't want her to play nurse. And then I said, "maybe that is why we are so afraid, because death is out of our hands, we typically don't get to say when our time is up," and then I gave him a smile and said, "there is no guarantee that I will be here tomorrow, we just have to make the best with what we have."
He goes on about how he use to talk to people that he no longer talks to, regrets of the things he didn't do and how he accepted it. He spoke of his mother, his uncle who led a life as a bootlegger and then he said, I'm sorry, not sure why I just told you all this and I smiled, I wanted to talk to him, give him some words of wisdom, but I just said, "you're good."
A moment ago this was a stranger, but after listening to him, I felt connected to him. He finished tuning the piano and then played three songs, all of which sounded vaguely familiar and I thanked him for playing those, I said, those were beautiful." He smiled and started to gather his things.
I wasn't sure what to say, here was a man who shared his thoughts and fears, I wanted to hug him, but I didn't. I said, "I'll see you in a couple months for another tuning," he said, "yes do." And then I said, "it was lovely meeting you, enjoy the rest of the day." He smiled grabbed my hand and said, "No, thank you - you are lovely, your partner is a lucky man, cherish each other." I smiled and said, thank you and until next time......
I don't why the man shared the thoughts he did with me, I'm not even sure he meant to, I certainly don't have the answers to life, but I know that sometimes we are so easily caught up in the happenings of our own things, that we become entangled in our own world that often times we forget to look out.
That we've forgotten to listen when someone says, "how are you," most of the time we don't even wait for a response or we just say "good." We are no longer connected, which is ironic. We live in a digital age...where we are literally connected to the world, but are those real connections? When this man walked in, I felt a sense of sadness and I hope on some level after he left, he felt a sense of relief, that what he was able to share was off his chest and he could enjoy the rest of the day.
I know that I will enjoy the rest of my day because of this man, because of his honesty.
"The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to just listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention....A loving silence often has far more power to heal and connect the most well-intentioned words." - Rachel Naomi Remen
He was suppose to come this morning, but about 20 minutes before he calls and says he had an unexpected appointment and depending on the outcome could he come after or if need be reschedule. He said it was health related and I said, "Of course, you have to take care of your health." He thanked me and said "I will either come by after my appointment or give you a call back."
A couple hours go by and he phones to tell me he will be by in a few minutes. He pulls up and out comes this older, full white beard, shorter type gentleman carrying a small tackle-like box. He comes in, looks at the piano, asks how we got it and checks it out. He tells me this is going to be a shock to the system, meaning that this piano is way out of tune and I'm like, "yea buddy, I know."
He then asked who played and I said my son, he is a beginner player. We small talked about music and I tell him how I am envious of anyone who has any sort of musical talent. I tell him about my grandparents and how my granddad and his brothers were all self-taught, but highly talented musicians and my nanny played the violin. I said somehow all that talent skipped me, he laughed. He said it is nice that I'm giving my kids the opportunity to play and I joked saying they had no choice.
I left him to get started on tuning the piano and then a few minutes later as I walked by, he stops and starts talking to me. At first thought, I didn't pay much attention, but then I could sense something was bothering him, he goes on about his health and how healthy he has been and it was at his wife's urging that he go to the doctor. He said I'm not sure what is going to come after all this, but I don't want to get caught in the system, you know, I'm an older man and I've seen so many get caught, I still have control over myself, so I imagine there is going to be a some sort of conflict after all is said and done.
I felt a bit uncomfortable, as I wasn't quite sure what to say, but then I thought, maybe he needs to just talk, so I didn't ask any questions, I just let him talk and I listened. He told me how he has led a full life of 73 years and if he goes, he wants to be in control, but then he would pause and say, it's my wife. I don't believe in miracles and she is not a patient women, I love her and I know she loves me, but I wouldn't want to do that to her, I don't want her to play nurse. And then I said, "maybe that is why we are so afraid, because death is out of our hands, we typically don't get to say when our time is up," and then I gave him a smile and said, "there is no guarantee that I will be here tomorrow, we just have to make the best with what we have."
He goes on about how he use to talk to people that he no longer talks to, regrets of the things he didn't do and how he accepted it. He spoke of his mother, his uncle who led a life as a bootlegger and then he said, I'm sorry, not sure why I just told you all this and I smiled, I wanted to talk to him, give him some words of wisdom, but I just said, "you're good."
A moment ago this was a stranger, but after listening to him, I felt connected to him. He finished tuning the piano and then played three songs, all of which sounded vaguely familiar and I thanked him for playing those, I said, those were beautiful." He smiled and started to gather his things.
I wasn't sure what to say, here was a man who shared his thoughts and fears, I wanted to hug him, but I didn't. I said, "I'll see you in a couple months for another tuning," he said, "yes do." And then I said, "it was lovely meeting you, enjoy the rest of the day." He smiled grabbed my hand and said, "No, thank you - you are lovely, your partner is a lucky man, cherish each other." I smiled and said, thank you and until next time......
I don't why the man shared the thoughts he did with me, I'm not even sure he meant to, I certainly don't have the answers to life, but I know that sometimes we are so easily caught up in the happenings of our own things, that we become entangled in our own world that often times we forget to look out.
That we've forgotten to listen when someone says, "how are you," most of the time we don't even wait for a response or we just say "good." We are no longer connected, which is ironic. We live in a digital age...where we are literally connected to the world, but are those real connections? When this man walked in, I felt a sense of sadness and I hope on some level after he left, he felt a sense of relief, that what he was able to share was off his chest and he could enjoy the rest of the day.
I know that I will enjoy the rest of my day because of this man, because of his honesty.
"The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to just listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention....A loving silence often has far more power to heal and connect the most well-intentioned words." - Rachel Naomi Remen
Thursday, September 12, 2013
Opting Out.....
My children are reaching an age where they will soon be required to take the standardized tests in school. I absolutely hated these tests when I was in school, regardless of how well I did, I always felt like I didn't do well enough because there was someone who did better. By the time I hit high school and needed to take my SAT's I had enough of "filling in the circle" that I took them without ever studying or preparing for the SAT's, my scores were average and I didn't care. When I took the ACT's, it was the same, I think there was one whole page that simply tried to make an image using the the circle bubbles. In fact, when we moved here and I applied to the local community college, I had to "retake" my ACT test and when I got my results and they compared them, she asked if I was not feeling that day. I told her no, I simply didn't try and that I wasn't interested in taking the test that day.
I've never like standardized tests and as I read more about the Common Core Standards the result that will come from that push, with more testing, I find myself at a cross-road....Do I opt my children out of these standardize tests (yes, you can opt out of them) or do I allow them to partake in these exams? I firmly believe these test actually do more harm and do not define the worth, the potential and the achievement of any students and yet state governments uses these tests to base their educational decisions on.
So, do we take a stand and say, "No, enough is enough, my child is not a test-score" and opt them out or by opting them out will it make my children feel isolated if all their peers are taking their standardized tests while they have to do something else or worse will they possibly feel humiliated and demoralized because of the results. I definitely think my children would do fine, I think we would be happy with the results, but I want to make the right decision for my children and I have been researching both sides of this debate, there is no right or wrong answer, but through all of it, one thing is definitely in agreement, these tests lack validity and are not a true measure of learning. Everyone tends to agree that all these tests are not really good indicators of classroom performance, but we use them nonetheless.
I'm torn and unsure what to do, what is right. My children go to a Montessori school, but they are still required to do the state testing of basic skills, which I find ironic because here in a Montessori setting the teacher is using an authentic assessment almost on a daily basis by observing, recording, and documenting the work that not only my child does, but all of the children. When I first decided to send my children to this school, I looked at the test score comparisons for the surrounding schools and it did factor into our decision, but again, here we have standardize tests that more often than not show a bias towards certain demographic groups.
The other reason is these tests provide only a small glimpse of what my children are capable of during a specific time, on a specific day under a certain setting - it is not a true measure of their ability, but is the result of various conditions (did they eat a good breakfast, did they sleep well, are their incentives, feelings of anxiety, frustration, or stress) all of which can taint the results of these tests.
So, even after sharing all this, I'm still not any clearer as to whether or not opt out of these test or not. We spoke with both of our children tonight as I definitely wanted their input, both said they would like to take these tests, but is in their best interest since these types of tests promote a culture of lying, cheating within the school and fosters competition instead of cooperation?
I want my children to learn and develop at their own pace following the educational philosophy that has been set forth by their Montessori school, which looks at the child as a whole, why is that so much to ask?
"Our care of the child should be governed, not by the desire to make him learn things, but by the endeavor always to keep burning within him that light which is called intelligence.”- Maria Montessori
“We cannot know the consequences of suppressing a child's spontaneity when he is just beginning to be active. We may even suffocate life itself. That humanity which is revealed in all its intellectual splendor during the sweet and tender age of childhood should be respected with a kind of religious veneration. It is like the sun which appears at dawn or a flower just beginning to bloom. Education cannot be effective unless it helps a child to open up himself to life.” - Maria Montessori
I've never like standardized tests and as I read more about the Common Core Standards the result that will come from that push, with more testing, I find myself at a cross-road....Do I opt my children out of these standardize tests (yes, you can opt out of them) or do I allow them to partake in these exams? I firmly believe these test actually do more harm and do not define the worth, the potential and the achievement of any students and yet state governments uses these tests to base their educational decisions on.
So, do we take a stand and say, "No, enough is enough, my child is not a test-score" and opt them out or by opting them out will it make my children feel isolated if all their peers are taking their standardized tests while they have to do something else or worse will they possibly feel humiliated and demoralized because of the results. I definitely think my children would do fine, I think we would be happy with the results, but I want to make the right decision for my children and I have been researching both sides of this debate, there is no right or wrong answer, but through all of it, one thing is definitely in agreement, these tests lack validity and are not a true measure of learning. Everyone tends to agree that all these tests are not really good indicators of classroom performance, but we use them nonetheless.
I'm torn and unsure what to do, what is right. My children go to a Montessori school, but they are still required to do the state testing of basic skills, which I find ironic because here in a Montessori setting the teacher is using an authentic assessment almost on a daily basis by observing, recording, and documenting the work that not only my child does, but all of the children. When I first decided to send my children to this school, I looked at the test score comparisons for the surrounding schools and it did factor into our decision, but again, here we have standardize tests that more often than not show a bias towards certain demographic groups.
The other reason is these tests provide only a small glimpse of what my children are capable of during a specific time, on a specific day under a certain setting - it is not a true measure of their ability, but is the result of various conditions (did they eat a good breakfast, did they sleep well, are their incentives, feelings of anxiety, frustration, or stress) all of which can taint the results of these tests.
So, even after sharing all this, I'm still not any clearer as to whether or not opt out of these test or not. We spoke with both of our children tonight as I definitely wanted their input, both said they would like to take these tests, but is in their best interest since these types of tests promote a culture of lying, cheating within the school and fosters competition instead of cooperation?
I want my children to learn and develop at their own pace following the educational philosophy that has been set forth by their Montessori school, which looks at the child as a whole, why is that so much to ask?
"Our care of the child should be governed, not by the desire to make him learn things, but by the endeavor always to keep burning within him that light which is called intelligence.”- Maria Montessori
“We cannot know the consequences of suppressing a child's spontaneity when he is just beginning to be active. We may even suffocate life itself. That humanity which is revealed in all its intellectual splendor during the sweet and tender age of childhood should be respected with a kind of religious veneration. It is like the sun which appears at dawn or a flower just beginning to bloom. Education cannot be effective unless it helps a child to open up himself to life.” - Maria Montessori
Pillow Talk
Last week as the kiddos were getting ready for bed, my sweet pea excitedly tells me how she applied for a "job" at school. She informs that if she is chosen she will need to go to the school at 7:30 in the morning as she would be a "bank teller" and they need time setting things up. I told her great and I said, did you have to do anything when you applied and she goes on about how she had to fill out an application and that one of the questions was, "Why do you think we should pick you for this position?"
I was curious, so I said, what did you write? And she said, "well you know things like I am responsible, kind, but then I put because I am AWESOME, in capital letters and with three exclamation points. I burst out laughing and said, well then there is no question, they should totally pick you. She smiled and I said so will you be disappointed if you don't get the job and she said, "I think it would be fun, but if it is not me that's okay too."
I told her to keep me posted and then planted her dreams for the night and went to do the same with my little man. After they were in bed, I couldn't stop thinking about what she put on her paper, "because I am AWESOME!!!" and I know it is such a minor thing, but when I was her age, I definitely didn't have the self-confidence to a) apply for a school job and b) would never consider writing down that I was awesome, because I didn't believe that at her age.
And as a parent you want your children to believe in themselves and their capabilities, to have a good self-image, and to be kind to others, but you never know how they internalize these things. And I never have thought to ask my kids what they thought of themselves, it was something I never thought to ask. We typically ask questions like:
And as I reflected on my own memories, I couldn't hold back my tears - it really hasn't been till recently that I am comfortable with my own self and that I started to feel confident in myself and it is not that my parents weren't encouraging because they were.There are just certain things that can happen in life that sometimes break your spirit and suddenly you see the world through a different lens then you once did...moments that happen that you wish didn't, but in the end you learn from them, even if it takes you a while.
Anyway, it made me feel blessed that my children have a good self-image of themselves, that they really do believe in themselves, that they feel they are awesome individuals because I certainly believe it! And it is these type of nights that I enjoy our pillow chats with my kiddos, I never know what I will learn.
"The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it.”- J.M. Barrie
I was curious, so I said, what did you write? And she said, "well you know things like I am responsible, kind, but then I put because I am AWESOME, in capital letters and with three exclamation points. I burst out laughing and said, well then there is no question, they should totally pick you. She smiled and I said so will you be disappointed if you don't get the job and she said, "I think it would be fun, but if it is not me that's okay too."
I told her to keep me posted and then planted her dreams for the night and went to do the same with my little man. After they were in bed, I couldn't stop thinking about what she put on her paper, "because I am AWESOME!!!" and I know it is such a minor thing, but when I was her age, I definitely didn't have the self-confidence to a) apply for a school job and b) would never consider writing down that I was awesome, because I didn't believe that at her age.
And as a parent you want your children to believe in themselves and their capabilities, to have a good self-image, and to be kind to others, but you never know how they internalize these things. And I never have thought to ask my kids what they thought of themselves, it was something I never thought to ask. We typically ask questions like:
- What are you thankful for today
- What did you dream about
- What was your favorite thing about today
- What did you learn about
- What is the best thing about school, friend, or your teacher
- Who is your hero
- What are you most proud about
- How would you describe yourself
- What is the best compliment you have received and given
And as I reflected on my own memories, I couldn't hold back my tears - it really hasn't been till recently that I am comfortable with my own self and that I started to feel confident in myself and it is not that my parents weren't encouraging because they were.There are just certain things that can happen in life that sometimes break your spirit and suddenly you see the world through a different lens then you once did...moments that happen that you wish didn't, but in the end you learn from them, even if it takes you a while.
Anyway, it made me feel blessed that my children have a good self-image of themselves, that they really do believe in themselves, that they feel they are awesome individuals because I certainly believe it! And it is these type of nights that I enjoy our pillow chats with my kiddos, I never know what I will learn.
"The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it.”- J.M. Barrie
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Car Trip Vacation......
As one last hurrah before school starts, we decided to take a mini vacation to Niagara Falls. We took the Northern most route and it took us about 16 hours total including all the pit stops along the way. Before we even left the house, the portable DVD decided to crap out, so we left it. The hubs and I thought, this will be a loooong drive, especially without it, but there was nothing we could do. So, we explained to the kids that it wasn't working and made sure they had some books and other activities to bring.
This trip was also going to be our first trip since we switch our diets to a more natural, whole food type of diet. We weren't going to be relying on fast food places for a quick bite to eat, so we packed crackers, bagels, cheese, lots of fruits, assorted nuts, some carrots, dried fruit, and a ton of water. I did throw in some lollies and treats I knew the kids would like.
We stopped somewhere in Indiana to eat lunch and in Erie, PA for dinner; the kids loved the picnic idea and we had no complaints about the food. We also didn't have any complaints or fights between the kids on the way, I was pleasantly surprised at how well the kids got along and behaved without the DVD player to entertain them on the car trip. We only use the DVD player for car trips, but this was the first time we had taken a car trip that was longer than six hours, but the kids managed without it. We ended up playing car games, I asked the kids if they thought we could find all 50 states license plates and so they had fun trying to find those. We ended up finding 47 states, the ones we couldn't find were Hawaii, Alaska, and South Dakota. We did eat at Anchor Bar in Buffalo, NY and they had a license plate on the wall from Hawaii and South Dakota, but we didn't count those.
Niagara Falls was beautiful, we stayed on the New York side, but ended up walking onto the Canadian side, which I was glad. The car traffic to get into Canada was about a two hour wait - we only had to wait about 20 minutes in line and it was only a 15 minute walk over the bridge.
I think my favorite part was the Maid of the Mist boat tour of the falls, it was great to get that close and we got absolutely soaked. The kids laughed as the water from the falls sprayed all over us and it was something we will never forget. If we had more time, I really wanted to drive down to my old hometown in PA, but we only really had four days, not counting the car time. We also visited the Columbus Zoo and although it definitely beats out our local zoo, I think I like the Omaha Zoo better. The kids had a blast and really that was all that matter, I think it was great way to end our summer vacation.
The kids are definitely ready to go back to school and see their friends and I just keep thinking, where is all this time going, 3rd and 2nd grade!
“It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.” - Ernest Hemingway
This trip was also going to be our first trip since we switch our diets to a more natural, whole food type of diet. We weren't going to be relying on fast food places for a quick bite to eat, so we packed crackers, bagels, cheese, lots of fruits, assorted nuts, some carrots, dried fruit, and a ton of water. I did throw in some lollies and treats I knew the kids would like.
We stopped somewhere in Indiana to eat lunch and in Erie, PA for dinner; the kids loved the picnic idea and we had no complaints about the food. We also didn't have any complaints or fights between the kids on the way, I was pleasantly surprised at how well the kids got along and behaved without the DVD player to entertain them on the car trip. We only use the DVD player for car trips, but this was the first time we had taken a car trip that was longer than six hours, but the kids managed without it. We ended up playing car games, I asked the kids if they thought we could find all 50 states license plates and so they had fun trying to find those. We ended up finding 47 states, the ones we couldn't find were Hawaii, Alaska, and South Dakota. We did eat at Anchor Bar in Buffalo, NY and they had a license plate on the wall from Hawaii and South Dakota, but we didn't count those.
Niagara Falls was beautiful, we stayed on the New York side, but ended up walking onto the Canadian side, which I was glad. The car traffic to get into Canada was about a two hour wait - we only had to wait about 20 minutes in line and it was only a 15 minute walk over the bridge.
This is the view of the American Falls from the Tower Wheel on the Canadian side
I think my favorite part was the Maid of the Mist boat tour of the falls, it was great to get that close and we got absolutely soaked. The kids laughed as the water from the falls sprayed all over us and it was something we will never forget. If we had more time, I really wanted to drive down to my old hometown in PA, but we only really had four days, not counting the car time. We also visited the Columbus Zoo and although it definitely beats out our local zoo, I think I like the Omaha Zoo better. The kids had a blast and really that was all that matter, I think it was great way to end our summer vacation.
The kids are definitely ready to go back to school and see their friends and I just keep thinking, where is all this time going, 3rd and 2nd grade!
“It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.” - Ernest Hemingway
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)