Yesterday, I spent most of my day at the hospital having the series of tests needed to see if I am healthy enough to donate my kidney to my mom. They couldn't get a vein in my right arm, so they took everything from my left and now I have an arm that looks like it has been beaten, but oh well, compared to what my mom goes through every other day on dialysis. I was so tired when I got home later that day that I went to bed. Today, I'm meeting with the donor advocate and then in December/January I'll be meeting with the doctors to discuss my results and the actual surgery...and after all that then the transplant committee will meet to discuss if it is something I can proceed with or even if my mom can withstand another transplant.
When I was talking with the transplant social worker, I started crying - I think it was all the testing and he was asking why I want to do this and when I started talking about my mom, I just started crying...I felt silly.
On a lighter note....later on that night, my sweet pea asked for some milk and she was standing next to me as I was pulling the milk container out, which has a small chicken on the container (Target's Archer Farm Organic milk) and she says, "No! Mommy not that milk....that's chicken milk...yucky!" Hubby and I just started laughing hilariously because I didn't even notice the chicken and when I asked her what made her think it was chicken milk, she points to the roster, which I said...I'm not sure why that is on there, but I promise it isn't chicken milk. She looked at me cautiously and said, "You drink it," so I did and she followed....
The things kids say.....
And if I don't post it on time.....Happy Halloween....
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Class Assignment
Okay, so I decided to post one of my class assignments on my blog, it is my Presentation Prowess assignment, which was to create a presentation using a combination of visuals and text, plus audio that is an instructional message...teaches somebody something. I had a terrible time trying to narrow down a topic, but I did and here it is....
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Why do the trees fall off the leaves?
A question posed to me from my inquisitive little girl. I giggled when she asked me because the perspective from children is sometimes so different and they make things seem so simple. So both hubby and I explained to why trees fall off the leaves and she smiled and said, "oh, so does that mean snow will come next? I can't wait for the cold to make snow."In the meantime I told her that if it was nice this weekend, that we can go for an adventure in the woods looking at all the different colored leaves. My little man yelled with excitment once he heard "adventure." I'm glad that they enjoy being outside, which reminded me that we took the kids camping for the first time two weekends ago. It was a last minute, spur of the moment decision on a Friday afternoon, so I think had we prepared a bit things would have gone better, but when we first got out there, I thought I was going to scream. The kids were so excited they were running everywhere while I was trying to set up our tent (which one of the poles broke as I was setting it up) and proceeded to take off into the woods running after daddy (although he didn't see them following). And the kids did not get the concept of "stay away from the fire" they kept wanting to throw the smores in the fire and my little man stuck a marshmallow on a stick that was just about two inches long and tries to roast it....yes, stressful and thankfully there were no hurts or booboos. It reminded me of something that should have been in one of Chevy Chase's National Lampoon Vacation movies.
And as I told hubby we were not trying this again for a while, my kids informed me of what a great time they had as we snuggled up for bed in our lopsided, broken tent and I realized that it really was a great time because that is our lives, crazy, stressful, and fun.
"Corn and grain, corn and grain, All that falls shall rise again."- Wiccan Harvest Chant
Friday, October 3, 2008
Waiting with growing frustration
Okay, if you read my blogs, you know that back in June, I blogged about the sewage that backed into our basement as well as into seven other homes on my street. Well we filed a claim with the city's insurance and we are still waiting for a decision as well as everyone else that has filed a claim to my knowledge. This happened the first weekend in June and we are now entering the first weekend of OCTOBER....4 months....what is the deal!
My hubby called and they said they were close to coming to a decision, this was three weeks ago. I know that they are in the interest of protecting the city, but this past week, I've been seeing survey crews and this morning I see a sewage pumping company on my street. We were told by a city employee that our street is the problem street b/c it goes from 16 inches to an 8 inch sewage drain, so it gets backed up on our street. He told my hubby that he informed the city of the problem when he first started 15 years ago and wanted to get an RFP to get it fixed, the city officials asked him how often would sewage backup occur and they decided it wasn't a big problem.
Yes, I posted that our basement was near completion, but there are still minor things that need to be done, that we are waiting for and not mention the personal belongings that we lost and waiting to replace since our insurance only covered structural damages. I can't tell you how upset I'm going to be if we have waited four months for them to turn around and tell us they are denying our claim, but my hubby said that we will proceed with a lawsuit if that happens. We are not even asking for everything we lost, we are only asking for what wasn't covered by our insurance and we didn't ask to be compensated for some things. We talked to our neighbors and they are asking for twice as much as what we are asking....the more I think about it, the more I think the city's insurance is just waiting us out, errrr!!!! It makes me so mad, especially when I see these crews on my street, looking at the sewers, which gives me the impression the city is surveying the sewers....yet there is no problem according to the city?!
My hubby called and they said they were close to coming to a decision, this was three weeks ago. I know that they are in the interest of protecting the city, but this past week, I've been seeing survey crews and this morning I see a sewage pumping company on my street. We were told by a city employee that our street is the problem street b/c it goes from 16 inches to an 8 inch sewage drain, so it gets backed up on our street. He told my hubby that he informed the city of the problem when he first started 15 years ago and wanted to get an RFP to get it fixed, the city officials asked him how often would sewage backup occur and they decided it wasn't a big problem.
Yes, I posted that our basement was near completion, but there are still minor things that need to be done, that we are waiting for and not mention the personal belongings that we lost and waiting to replace since our insurance only covered structural damages. I can't tell you how upset I'm going to be if we have waited four months for them to turn around and tell us they are denying our claim, but my hubby said that we will proceed with a lawsuit if that happens. We are not even asking for everything we lost, we are only asking for what wasn't covered by our insurance and we didn't ask to be compensated for some things. We talked to our neighbors and they are asking for twice as much as what we are asking....the more I think about it, the more I think the city's insurance is just waiting us out, errrr!!!! It makes me so mad, especially when I see these crews on my street, looking at the sewers, which gives me the impression the city is surveying the sewers....yet there is no problem according to the city?!
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Mommy to Mama
Well for the past week and half, my little girl has been calling me "mama," which I found interesting how one day I was simply "mommy" and now I'm "mama." I'm not sure I'm ready for it, I enjoyed being called mommy and granted my little man still is calling me mommy, but what triggered her transition?
The first couple days I didn't say anything, but after day four I asked her why she was calling me "mama," and she looked at me with her great big blue eyes and said, "Cause, I like it, I like the sound." Now, I really wasn't looking for a justification and was impressed that my three year old said that, so I told her, okay, mama it will be.
I do want to giggle each time she says it because it sounds a little bit different each time she says it, especially if I haven't answered her the first time, it goes....mama...maw maw....maaaaama...ma ma and I'm still getting used to it because I just see it as pretty soon, it will then be just mom and I'm definitely not ready to be "mom." They are my bebes and I want to be "mommy" for as long as I can - yes I want them to grow, but not so quickly.
"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.” - Rajneesh
The first couple days I didn't say anything, but after day four I asked her why she was calling me "mama," and she looked at me with her great big blue eyes and said, "Cause, I like it, I like the sound." Now, I really wasn't looking for a justification and was impressed that my three year old said that, so I told her, okay, mama it will be.
I do want to giggle each time she says it because it sounds a little bit different each time she says it, especially if I haven't answered her the first time, it goes....mama...maw maw....maaaaama...ma ma and I'm still getting used to it because I just see it as pretty soon, it will then be just mom and I'm definitely not ready to be "mom." They are my bebes and I want to be "mommy" for as long as I can - yes I want them to grow, but not so quickly.
"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.” - Rajneesh
Friday, September 26, 2008
Decisions, Decisions
I had posted earlier that my sister was chosen as the living donor and her testing began, well there was some concerns with her and so she can't go through with the living donation and thus it has fallen to me.
So, I talked it over with hubby because I know that he is thinking of this from a different point of view and I honestly couldn't go through with this without his support. He wanted me to discuss it with my mom because all he has heard from her is that she doesn't want another transplant and her recovery from this past surgery took a major toll on her physically and emotionally, so I did ask her. I told her to be honest with me and she did break down and tell me that yes she does want one, which was all I needed to hear. Hubby says he will support my decision and I hope he meant it.
I told transplant services that they could schedule the secound round of testing as I'd like to know if there would be any issues like they ran into with my sister, which would prevent me from being a donor, so testing should begin in the next month or two. I also asked that if all comes back good, could we wait till I finished my master's program as that would be one last issue to worry about, so they said we could schedule the surgery whenever my mom and I wanted it, which put me a bit at ease. The recovery is six weeks, so once I get past the second round of testing I will need to start thinking about childcare for my bebes, my sister said she will come and stay a week or two and I want my kids around, so hopefully that will work out.
So time-wise if all goes good with the testing - the surgery would be sometime next year, my master's program is over in August '09 and then after recovery maybe we can all go to New Zealand together.
So, I talked it over with hubby because I know that he is thinking of this from a different point of view and I honestly couldn't go through with this without his support. He wanted me to discuss it with my mom because all he has heard from her is that she doesn't want another transplant and her recovery from this past surgery took a major toll on her physically and emotionally, so I did ask her. I told her to be honest with me and she did break down and tell me that yes she does want one, which was all I needed to hear. Hubby says he will support my decision and I hope he meant it.
I told transplant services that they could schedule the secound round of testing as I'd like to know if there would be any issues like they ran into with my sister, which would prevent me from being a donor, so testing should begin in the next month or two. I also asked that if all comes back good, could we wait till I finished my master's program as that would be one last issue to worry about, so they said we could schedule the surgery whenever my mom and I wanted it, which put me a bit at ease. The recovery is six weeks, so once I get past the second round of testing I will need to start thinking about childcare for my bebes, my sister said she will come and stay a week or two and I want my kids around, so hopefully that will work out.
So time-wise if all goes good with the testing - the surgery would be sometime next year, my master's program is over in August '09 and then after recovery maybe we can all go to New Zealand together.
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Family Unity
I decided that I'm going to list three things that I love about each of my immediate family members (no worries the list won't be that long). With my mom having her health problems and my sister recently going through some things, I felt I needed to get it out there, like most families we have had fun, crazy, stressful, ups and downs - sometimes wondering if these people were really related (wink wink) and I don't know if I've ever really told any of them what I love about them....so here it is....
The Three Reasons Why I Love.....
My Hubby - my love - you married me...need I say more....
1. You make me laugh, even when I don't want to and I try to fight it
2. You balance me out - you are spontaneous when I wouldn't otherwise be
3. You always tell me you love me
My SweetPea - you are my first, my little girl
1. Your love of knowledge
2. Your imagination
3. You are an old soul, even at three years old
My Little Man - my boy who has already had stiches and the one I will always worry about
1. Your curiousity
2. Your laugh
3. Your my fighter, yet a gentle spirit
My Brother - what can I say, you are 10 years younger than me and think you know it all....
1. You are fun to be with
2. You are a good helper
3. I've seen you cry
My Sister - we've had our fair share of fights and your older, yet somehow I get pegged as the oldest
1. Your big heart
2. Your carefree spirit (to a certain point)
3. You don't give up
My Dad - really what can I say, you've done so much
1. Your constant support
2. Your quiet nature
3. Your time in the military, a service I may never understand as a civilian and may have resented as a child, but I've come to realize that perhaps there were times you gave up more than we did
My Mom - my best friend, again there is so much more to say, but to narrow it down to three
1. Your resilience and strength - I know it has been tough these last few weeks, but you are stronger than you realize - something I have always admired in you
2. Your fiesty spirit
3. Watching you with my children and how happy you make them
Wow - this was a lot harder than I thought! As I was going through it, I thought of all the good, fun, bad, and sometimes hurtful moments throughout my life and to try to narrow it to three reasons was hard and also uplifting. It makes me realize how blessed I am to have all these people in my life.
My mom told me that she felt something had changed within her after this last bout - that she has accepted that her time may be coming, which is what sparked this and MOM - I can't say what you are feeling as I have not gone through what you are, but I know you are a fighter, you always have been, sometimes you just need to be reminded to fight.
My family, it is never a dull moment, but that is what makes us great, we each bring something to the other.
"The family. We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together." - Erma Bombeck
The Three Reasons Why I Love.....
My Hubby - my love - you married me...need I say more....
1. You make me laugh, even when I don't want to and I try to fight it
2. You balance me out - you are spontaneous when I wouldn't otherwise be
3. You always tell me you love me
My SweetPea - you are my first, my little girl
1. Your love of knowledge
2. Your imagination
3. You are an old soul, even at three years old
My Little Man - my boy who has already had stiches and the one I will always worry about
1. Your curiousity
2. Your laugh
3. Your my fighter, yet a gentle spirit
My Brother - what can I say, you are 10 years younger than me and think you know it all....
1. You are fun to be with
2. You are a good helper
3. I've seen you cry
My Sister - we've had our fair share of fights and your older, yet somehow I get pegged as the oldest
1. Your big heart
2. Your carefree spirit (to a certain point)
3. You don't give up
My Dad - really what can I say, you've done so much
1. Your constant support
2. Your quiet nature
3. Your time in the military, a service I may never understand as a civilian and may have resented as a child, but I've come to realize that perhaps there were times you gave up more than we did
My Mom - my best friend, again there is so much more to say, but to narrow it down to three
1. Your resilience and strength - I know it has been tough these last few weeks, but you are stronger than you realize - something I have always admired in you
2. Your fiesty spirit
3. Watching you with my children and how happy you make them
Wow - this was a lot harder than I thought! As I was going through it, I thought of all the good, fun, bad, and sometimes hurtful moments throughout my life and to try to narrow it to three reasons was hard and also uplifting. It makes me realize how blessed I am to have all these people in my life.
My mom told me that she felt something had changed within her after this last bout - that she has accepted that her time may be coming, which is what sparked this and MOM - I can't say what you are feeling as I have not gone through what you are, but I know you are a fighter, you always have been, sometimes you just need to be reminded to fight.
My family, it is never a dull moment, but that is what makes us great, we each bring something to the other.
"The family. We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together." - Erma Bombeck
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