10 minutes of HELL

Yes, my beloved little sweet pea decided to throw an all out fit of tantrum yesterday while I was with my mom at the mall. It started out with her finger grabbing everything she could touch, which I warned, "if you don't keep your hands to your side, then we will not ride the train." She stopped for all of five minutes and then proceeded to mess with the t-shirt display and so came another warning, "keep it up and we will wait in the car." So then my little man starts to follow suit of his sister and as I'm giving him his warning, she takes off and hides behind one of the displays (I see her instantly) and tell her to come over to me right now, she doesn't listen, I ask her again, nope.

Ok by this time, I had it, I could feel my blood pressure rising and my mom gave me her car keys, I grabbed the kids and proceeded to head out and that is when it started. "I'll be good!" she screamed. No, sorry - I gave you three opportunities to be good and you didn' listen, so we leave. She kicks, she cries, she screams for her nana as we head up the escalator and people are giving me the "Oh my god, what is she doing to that child" look.....Yes, people I'm holding my child's hand as we go up the escalator and yes she is screaming bloody murder because she doesn't want to go, and yes I am praying for the higher spirit to give me the strength to survive this unbearable moment. Meanwhile, my son (I think) is in complete shock of the whole event because he doesn't make a peep.

We get to the top and I see the exit door, yes, this horrifying moment is almost over as she is continuing to scream and yell, I want to say "f#@$ it" and just stay for the sake of her to stop, but I knew that if I did that, what message does that send? That your behavior was acceptable and throwing temper tantrums gets you what you want in the end, so I forced myself to continue the walk to the door, I could sense a few people behind me and finally reached to open the door and then pixie grabs anything to hold her from making into the exit door, the woman behind me almost falls on top of us. I apologize, she gives me the "poor you" look and proceeds to say something that I didn't hear because of the crying. We make it to the car, I open the door, get my little man in and then I look at my daughter and want to cry.

I say nothing to her and get in the car, she proceeds to kick and says, "I will be good, I promise." I look at her again, and said, do you think that is good behavior, what are you doing right now - I tell her she is getting a naughty check mark for her behavior and that sends her into another tizzy, finally after about another minute or so, she settles down - just in time for my mom to come back to the car.

My mom says nothing and we start to leave, then my son says, "Nanny, are you mad?" and she replies, "No, bub I'm not mad." Then he says, "Oh,okay, mommy is mad, she's f%$#ing mad."

I wanted to die at that moment - oh calgon...take me away...


"While we try to teach our children all about life, Our children teach us what life is all about." ~Angela Schwindt

Where to go and What to do

Hubby and I have started talking about planning a minivacation for the two of us, it has been a year since our last vacation to the beautiful Aotearoa and as much as I'd love to go again, it isn't feasible this year and I think we are only thinking about about an extended weekend.
I didn't think it would be hard to find a place to go and we started thinking about Grand Cayman since we went there for our honeymoon and then all-inclusive resorts in Jamaica and Bermuda...and we priced out some last minute packages which were all in all a great deal, but when I looked at the final price, I told hubby, I couldn't do it. I felt guilty for spending that much money on ourselves, those darn kids what have they done to me...passing up a nice vacation on the beach being pampered while I sip on my fruity cocktail.
My reasoning, the amount we could spend at one of those all-inclusive places, we could easily go to Disneyworld for 7 days and stay at one of the resorts there and have enough for a weekend getaway within the US for the two of us, so I told him I'd much rather do that. Yes I want a nice getaway for just hubby and I, but for the amount those places were asking, I could go to New Zealand and I definitely would choose a trip to NZ again, but since this is suppose to be a long weekend getaway, it wouldn't be worth it to fly to NZ for 4 days, especially since you lose a day with the time change.
So we know that we will be taking the kids to Orlando sometime, now it is just deciding where the two of us want to go for a long weekend...any suggestions?

Bedtime

I wrote this poem while laying with my little ones during bedtime and decided to put it into Wordle



Here is the original poem

Bedtime by Dena Fife

shadows dance
along the wall
it's a show
for you and me

imagining
all the different
things that
we can see

If you haven't checked out wordle, it is a lot of fun...just type or paste words in and it creates "word clouds" http://www.wordle.net/

New Addition

And so my hubby thinks that our household isn't busy enough, we have added a new member to our family...he is an 11-week old Puggle....a cutie who stole the heart of my kids and hubby, he is slowly growing on me....alright, he stole mine too.

We had been talking about getting another doggie, but had decided to wait till Spring...well alas this little fellow fell into our paths and when I saw my hubby holding him and kissing his face, I knew I had no choice. I tried to play hardball...telling him it wasn't the right time, it was getting close to winter and I really didn't want to deal with potty training, and I wasn't sure if it would be fair to Barney and Pongo, but I lost. I knew I lost and I sometimes wonder why I even try.

This little brown nose pup slept on my lap on the way home, nuzzling me and all the while I remained like I didn't care and then when hubby went into the store to get some of the necessary puppy things, I melted.

So far he is doing great with Barney and although Pongo is not quite sure what to think, he is slowly warming up, letting this little one come close enough to touch before Pongo darts off to some corner of the house.

Hubby named him Yoder, but the kids are calling him Yoger and so I've started calling him that as well...I can tell he will be a mischief maker and into everything....ahh the joys of puppyhood.

The Weather is a Changing

It is starting to rain, okay pouring and we are expected to get snow flurries on Friday, which is of course normal for this time of year in Iowa, but I must admit that we've had some really outstanding, beautiful weather these past few days and I'm not sure I'm quite ready for the cold weather, burrr.

I've enjoyed taking the kids out to the park and just playing outdoors with all the changing leaves, which I might add have taken over our backyard.


My little sweet pea asked me when winter was coming and I told her soon enough, she said she is excited for snow angels, ahh the innocence of childhood. I on the otherhand get crabby and depressed....I woke up this morning and could feel the grumpiness inside me wanting to push out...I hate it.

And alas America's next president was chosen, Barack Obama and it was the biggest voter turnout in history. Congratulations to Obama and all his supporters, I was not one, but I am indeed proud of this moment in history.

Election Day Drawing Near

Election Day is near and the media is already projecting who the winner is and in all honesty, I hate discussing politics, because people get so emotional about it, it is like you can't even have a rationale conversation, but since I'm not really conversing here, I wanted to rant and that is what I'm going to do.

First, I was drawn into Obama immediately, I was so excited when he won here in Iowa and indeed I thought that I would vote for him, but I have changed my mine....so now you must be thinking that I'm voting for McCain...at this point, he is out too.

I'm going to vote third-party this election. I am so disgusted with the way both campaigns have run that I really don't believe we are not living in a democratic society, it is biased and it is heartbreaking and both camps should be ashamed, these are the two candidates that are suppose to be our next leaders...seriously? And not to mention that third-party candidates don't get any coverage, even if their ideas are sometimes better.

But here is what really bothered me about Obama, one was his experience, since he has been campaigning most of the time, he has only spent about 146 days in the senate and the other issue I had was the Reverend White incident, how can you honestly say you had no idea of the beliefs and thoughts regarding the person whom was an advisor and has played a role throughout your life, for me, I would have had more respect for him had he been honest about it and frankly Obama is just saying what people want to hear. The other issue I have is the media has purposely withheld information regarding Obama when they wouldn't give McCain the same and considering I got my undergrad in mass communication and journalism, I was taught that you don't pick a side and that sadly isn't the case, here is an article that I found interesting http://article.nationalreview.com/?q=ZDFkMGE2MmM1M2Q5MmY0ZmExMzUxMWRhZGJmMTAyOGY=

Now don't get me wrong, there have been things McCain has said that I think, seriously and I think his choice of vice president was purely to get him up on the polls, she has been more of a disappointment than anything else, so I decided about a month ago that I would vote for one of the many third-party candidates.

It would be my way of saying, I'm tired of this government bullshit and popularity contest, which that is what this is boiling down to and then the comment that Biden makes regarding Obama. "Mark my words. It will not be six months before the world tests Barack Obama like they did John Kennedy. The world is looking," Biden said.
"Remember I said it standing here, if you don't remember anything else I said. Watch, we're gonna have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy. And he's gonna have to make some really tough -- I don't know what the decision's gonna be, but I promise you it will occur. As a student of history and having served with seven presidents, I guarantee you it's gonna happen," Biden continued.

Okay, that was scary...and granted I think any future president is going to be tested, but really, this is what you think of your running mate? Yet, it got me thinking that perhaps the democratic party is using Obama as a sacrificial lamb...they have made so many comparisons about Obama and JFK and even with comparing his wife to Jackie O, Obama will have two small children when he takes the presidency and so did JFK....so it makes me wonder if there is someone who knows something more and will there be an assassination attempt on him if he gets in? I really hope not, but there are indeed some backass people in this country and if that were to happen, will American people unite as they did when JFK died or will it tear us apart?
Or if by chance McCain does pull the votes to win, will it create turmoil within or will people shout racism or cheaters? We are indeed living in a historical moment, there is no doubt that history will be made on Tuesday, but are we prepared to deal with the outcomes regardless of who takes office, it will be a battle ground for either.
And as I am continually told, that a vote for a third-party candidate is a waste, they have no chance of winning, true, yet I hear from so many that they feel the same way as I do, but they can't vote third-party, well perhaps if all of us who felt the same way did vote third-party, there could have been a chance for real change and for me, I'm voting for the candidate that best aligns with my views.



"The key to change.....is to let go of fear." - Rosanne Cash

Happenings

Yesterday, I spent most of my day at the hospital having the series of tests needed to see if I am healthy enough to donate my kidney to my mom. They couldn't get a vein in my right arm, so they took everything from my left and now I have an arm that looks like it has been beaten, but oh well, compared to what my mom goes through every other day on dialysis. I was so tired when I got home later that day that I went to bed. Today, I'm meeting with the donor advocate and then in December/January I'll be meeting with the doctors to discuss my results and the actual surgery...and after all that then the transplant committee will meet to discuss if it is something I can proceed with or even if my mom can withstand another transplant.
When I was talking with the transplant social worker, I started crying - I think it was all the testing and he was asking why I want to do this and when I started talking about my mom, I just started crying...I felt silly.

On a lighter note....later on that night, my sweet pea asked for some milk and she was standing next to me as I was pulling the milk container out, which has a small chicken on the container (Target's Archer Farm Organic milk) and she says, "No! Mommy not that milk....that's chicken milk...yucky!" Hubby and I just started laughing hilariously because I didn't even notice the chicken and when I asked her what made her think it was chicken milk, she points to the roster, which I said...I'm not sure why that is on there, but I promise it isn't chicken milk. She looked at me cautiously and said, "You drink it," so I did and she followed....
The things kids say.....

And if I don't post it on time.....Happy Halloween....